Half A Life; Half The Credit

 

The world is a crazy place right now. It seems to test us more as we close in on the final stretches of the pandemic. And each of us struggles in our own way to try and figure it all out.  While there is hope, there is also much frustration. 

Over the past several weeks, I just gave up writing.  There has been so much happening.  We lost 2 of our older cats to something that resembled feline covid but gained two new members and were able to save our other 2 older girls. We can't shake that we somehow failed to protect them.  Even with 3 vets looking into it all; we were left with no answers. There are often moments of joy with the younger ones dotted by moments of sadness. 

Then there is work.  I don't know what happened to this semester.  It all seems so surreal.  Teachers are being forced to give students half credit for doing nothing.  There is no accountability at all and it goes against every moral fiber of our being. They ask, "How are you?" But they don't mean it. It's just a check on their list that their bosses told them to do. We see through it all. I am an understanding and patient man but to give basically free points to students/parents who abuse the system with unexcused absences? It truly is a lost year. I am not happy about giving free points to those who do not work for them.  Even with a pandemic, there are rules that need to be followed. Leadership on every level in this country has failed the American public. 

Then there is the birding.  I have been reduced to part time birder.  My heart doesn't seem to be into much of it anymore.  Rare birds aren't rare anymore.  I see people's excitement and I don't feel their joy. That scares me a lot. The weirdest part? I have found joy in watching the simple House Finch come to my feeders.  Or watch the Yellow-rumped Warbler feed from my oranges and suet.  I began this blog gardening and then became a birder.  I now find myself turning back into the gardener!  I hope this will pass. My friends tell me that this is common.  Sometimes you have to take a break. I still love my birds, but I have found other interests again.  The silver lining of covid.  Home projects are taking hold of me!  Birding money is spent into home design and art. 

I have been enjoying the work done on the coastal room. We put new furniture together and opened up the space a lot.  I've purchased paint and new light fixtures and have gotten into the art of remodeling. Our next project happens in several months.  It's all set to go.  In February, the coastal bathroom becomes a reality.  

With everything happening at home, like the roof being redone, landscaping...removing of a tree and pruning, etc, I haven't been able to bird like a normal human.  I'd say that I've gotten maybe 3 days to bird all day long.  And it's not even really about birding so much as it is about just taking a walk outdoors. 

I was finally able to do some birding with Gordon who I haven't seen since March!!!  We drove to this area just to check out things.  The best part of that day was catching up with him.  I miss hanging out with him.  Another day, I drove to a far away place to look at a beautiful Field Sparrow.  It was cloudy cool and quiet.  It was what I needed.  

I am going through something.  It's not good or bad.  Not even sure if it's really depression, but I just want to be alone working on personal projects away from everything.  I am emotionally exhausted.  Another road trip is in the works.  I was even thinking about going to Panama City, Panama because I have free flight mileage but covid is raging again and I am so near getting the vaccine. It's too risky.  I don't want to lose my airline points because of a cancellation, etc. 

Teachers in Arizona are set to be one of the first groups to get the vaccinations in the beginning of January. So that means I'll probably take the USS Betty White up along the coast to be near the ocean again to get some fresh air. And play it safe. It would also be nice avoiding getting covid a second time:)  

Right now, the USS Betty White is being serviced for a long range trek.  After that is done, I have to get new tires on the vehicle. In the above pic, a local Javelina eats pecans around my vehicle, the USS Betty White. 

For now, we all sit in a holding pattern.  We wait.  And wait.  A year lost?  Or a year full of new appreciation and perspective?  It will take awhile but at least the vaccinations have begun.  My last blog for the year will be the highlights of 2020.  There were some:)

I sit with my cats now in the catio having coffee with them watching birds and bugs. It's kind of my favorite part of the day.  

The year 2021 is beginning to shape up.  I am hopeful.  It could be the renaissance we have all been waiting for.  And one that we'll never take for granted again. Until next time......

Turning Over A New Leaf

Western Screech-Owl near my work site

I am healing.  I am getting stronger, but it's slow. You'd think I was out every day looking for birds, but I am not.  I have three really important goals right now.  Walk more.  Lose this stubborn belly fat.  And drop the weight. 

A pack of Javelina or Collared Peccary cross a pumpkin patch to get to a river

On the financial level.  Save money.  Stay at home.  Make this year about birding Pima County well. It's a huge county, but I know where to go.  There are just a few people who know Pima a little better.  But I've made notes over the years for a year like this one.  And it has paid off so far locating certain difficult bird species. 

This brillaint Lillian's Eastern Meadowlark is a favorite of mine

I had habitat picked out.  Just never had the time to do the slow investigation that was needed.  But I'm glad I made the notes as it has made my job so far a breeze.  Some birders get angry that I hide my reports about certain rare birds.  That's ok. I learned my lesson a long time ago.  I told someone and they told others.  And then the bird was never seen again. I'm a quick learner. If you are a true birder, you know and understand a bird's habitat requirements. And with that knowledge, you can find the bird you are looking for. I need birders to know that the bird's safety comes first. So far, I've been excited by the owl discoveries.  From Long-eared Owls to Barn Owls to Burrowing Owls, the trickiest in my county, to the easier Western Screech-Owl and nesting Great Horned Owls.

The Round-tailed Ground Squirrel peaks up from a hole to make sure it's safe to search for food

This slow methodical approach has really allowed me to absorb all the habitats more.  Take my time.  Explore new mapped out spaces for certain species. Granted the beginning of the year is always the easiest. 

Work has taken up much of my time allowing me to bird once or twice a week. 

It has been a wonderful time connecting with birders.  Just sitting on a bench and helping a visitor ID a new bird or a difficult sparrow.  There is nothing new anymore here in Arizona except for the personal connections I make with birders and their love for birds.  It makes me smile.  The more I do this; the more I realize I'm beginning to fill in vacant roles that were once filled by birders who are no longer with us. In a way, it's a very sobering thought.

The subtle beauty of a Lincoln's Sparrow

I have changed as a teacher this year as well.  I am more relaxed than I have ever been with my students.  We talk and I teach.  When I'm done with my lesson, a student shares with me a bird they've seen.  They show me a picture and I ask them about the bird and if they know what kind of bird it is, etc etc.  

A Common Raven comes in for a sip of water

 I speak to a new friend on the phone.  An opportunity arises for my students.  I am excited.  So we begin to brainstorm.  I begin to write down a strategy to see if we can maybe make this student trek to our national park happen. What if it was an overnight 2 day event?  And what if we could give them the hands on experience necessary to excite their minds for a future of protecting our beautiful and sacred Sonoran desert?  I am very grateful for the conversation and also for the opportunity to get to know another kindred spirit.

A Pied-billed Grebe hunts for larvae in the murky water

 At home, I find a Canyon Tree Frog in my garden!  I watch my new friend sit every day on one of my Mexican pots as it bathes in the sun.  The nights get cold and I wonder if the frog will make it.  In the morning as I put oranges out for my Verdins, I check to make sure the frog is okay.  And there the frog is.  And I smile. 

A wonderful and shocking surprise in my garden, the Canyon Tree Frog, sits on top of my Mexican pots.  Where did it come from?  I never touch that part of my garden.  Has it lived in the soil of that pot for a long time?

 In the quiet of my office, I research and plan for my July trip to the Darien Gap in Panama.  I purchase a ticket for the entire month.  The first half will be grueling as we hunt for the Harpy Eagle.  The second half will be my vacation. I'll sit in my rocker on the veranda overlooking the gardens and coffee plantations in Boquete wearing my sweatpants sipping on something warm. I will meet up again with Ivan in Gamboa.  And I sense I'll finally get to meet some "friends" from Facebook for the first time in person. 

A Botta's Pocket Gopher comes up to grab a bite of grass

Each year is a new chapter in our life.  We can let it pass us by or we can make each day an event. After being stuck at home to heal for several months, it's good to feel stronger.  And it's good to get out again and be a part of the community.  The pause in my life was a good thing. 

There are goals to be achieved for sure during this important year of 2020. We'll meet up with Nancy and her sister for a wonderful hummingbird hunt in March. We'll explore new birding hotspot, the Canoa Ranch and do a Hawk Watch in March with Tucson Audubon. We'll also visit the garden at El Presidio as I add several new native plants to our property. Then our friend Dr. Steve from Wales comes in April to chase Arizona lifers.  Our Tucson Audubon Big Day will be some time in April/May as we, the Wrenegades, try to find as many bird species as we can in one day. And there are so many more things that will happen.  But for now, I'm birding at my own pace.  I'm sleeping in during the mornings as much as I can.  I'm still a birder but a much more relaxed one now. Until next time.....