To Live Each Day

Pima County has really seen numbers of Crested Caracaras jump.  I can't believe how many times I've seen these birds this year.  I finally have a shot I can make into a larger photo for the wall. 

If you knew what your "end date" would be, how would you live your life?  Would you wait for it to come?  Would you seize the moment and live it the best that you could? Would you say your good-byes to friends and family? How would you do it?  Back in the summer of 1987, I saw my past, present and future flash before my eyes.  I learned a huge lesson from my Grandpa who was looking forward to retirement and passed away before his time, seize the day.  

All of it ended with a massive heart attack while working outside in his backyard. For the years I knew him, he was a happy man, most of the time:)  We found adventure around every corner of their backyard along the river and woods, or while boating on Lake Michigan, or while eating at a restaurant in town....and even while gardening with grandma! Sometimes I hated it because she had a HUGE garden! Even breakfast in the morning was fun because we looked forward to visitors joining us telling us what they were going to do for the day. 

I remember sitting that first Christmas without him.  Nothing was quite the same again.  It was as if life had lost its flavor.  The holiday had also died for me on that day. A similar situation happened while standing outside in the snow while I looked into my parent's home at my grandma surrounded by family and relatives. I saw my grandma, dad, his brother, and her niece all standing together.  My little sister joined me and I told her to memorize that moment.  The following year, my grandma passed away.  As a child, I memorized every little space of their home and gardens. The dinner smells, the Sunday drives, the conversations, the games we played.....and the toys in that hallway closet. They were all very special moments

Like most of us, we learn from our families and if we look close enough, there are lessons to be learned from each of our friends, siblings, parents and grandparents.  I write about these two individuals because they were some of the people who helped me define how I looked at life. One was looking forward to retiring while the other waited for death to happen. During our weekly conversations, Grandma Rohrer had once told me that living longer than her friends and husband was awful, especially when she couldn't see or use her hands due to arthritis. Four of her favorite past times were reading, cooking, gardening and the thing that isn't quite sewing. Crochet? Anyhow, they both taught me to live life NOW.  Sometimes, it may seem in the eyes of others, selfish but I don't want to be on that bed dying regretting not having lived. I became a teacher so that I didn't have to have kids of my own and explore the planet for study.  My siblings have more than made up for the nephews and nieces count:)

My third year of teaching on the island of Santiago in Cape Verde off the coast of West Africa

I was struck recently by this quote "Because it's not enough to just live.  You have to have something to live for."  For some, it's having children.  For others, it's something else. For me, my purpose is through teaching, conservation work and the exploration of the unknown.  I know that when I'm gone, I will have left my mark. 

My little sis and I enjoy a fun trek to Rio Dulce in Guatemala

Fortunately most people get to enjoy their retirement.  But I think retirement can also be a little like this covid era living. With a lack of focus and the unknown, every day seems like one endless day after another. Often many people get depressed. I deal with this stress by going out birding, but with the 100+ temps now, it isn't easy.  Many people have felt locked up and lost. At the beginning of my writes since this lock down, I wrote about how nice it was to get this break in life. I may have changed my tune a bit:)

In 2008, we hiked the Inka Trail to Machu Picchu

As this has all gone on now for some time, I have also noticed entire life changes happening for friends who have found their way of living forever altered. For 10 years, I have assumed that I would have a long time to bird around the world.  I have also assumed that others would be able to do the same thing, or for at least a longer time.  It doesn't work that way and it's that realization that's beginning to sink in now. 

I'm super disappointed that I won't be able to see this guy again, Ivan from Gamboa, Panama this year.  Maybe next year. 

Last year, it struck close to home when both my father and friend's husband had to go through major surgeries. Our plans changed and we made it work. It was a lot of fun. Last October, my health took a turn for the worse. And this year Covid put an end to our planned Panama trek.  We got the phone call on Wednesday that all flights into Panama were cancelled.  In some ways, it was a relief helping me organize Plan B. But even with that, there have been personal complications.  And at the moment, if I am to be completely honest, I feel lost. However, something deep inside of me tells me to get into my vehicle and go.  It's a bit scary and it shouldn't be.  I used to do it all the time.  Ah age! It makes us a bit more wary. 

Photo by Alan Van Norman; to see how good I am at taking nightjar photos....here's my attempt below!  LOL.  I've seen these birds a lot, but I never can get this kind of photo:)  Nor do I really try.  I just like listening to their staccato song. 

Over the past week, I helped a friend with a client who had survived covid. We went to a remote area along the border that requires a bit of security. It was a beautiful evening as we went into the remote canyons far far away from civilization.  There we sat under the starry sky and listened to the Buff-collared Nightjar.  Absolutely wonderful.

The day before, I was in Ajo with my friend Celeste and Cheroot.  We went into the Alamos Canyon area of Organ Pipe and as we exited the canyon, Celeste's vehicle began to experience a really bad grinding sound. A stupid rock got caught between her brakes! We didn't want to do further damage to the vehicle, which I believe it would have done had we kept driving.  Thankfully, we were able to flag down some border patrol agents in this very remote area. We did have plenty of food and water with us, thanks to Celeste. Poor Cheroot had a very long day as we were towed back into Tucson.  

Luna helps me unpack my canvas prints from my tropical series from Trinidad and Costa Rica

Life is always full of good and bad surprises.  The older I get, the more I think it gets to be a bit more unpredictable.  I completed my room project during this time off.  My photography only makes me want to get back into the field even more.  For now, I have postponed the dream.  If October happens, I will treat myself to a monk's sanctuary in Guatemala to celebrate my birthday. It will be a spiritual retreat. And if December happens, I plan on going with my other half to Hawaii.  There are still so many unknowns in every sense of that word, but I will seize the day and live a full life.  We will reschedule our Panama trek for next year.  I mean after all, finding a Harpy Eagle is on my bucket list. 

They say Ferruginous Pygmy Owls are all over Organ Pipe Cactus National Monument  😉
Why pay a million dollars in Texas to go to King's Ranch when you can see much more for free here? Just saying.

So we have rescheduled for next year.  It will be a big event as I mark a very important milestone in my life, the anniversary of embracing the life of a birder. I have changed as a person.  And my life has changed because of it. Until next time....

I stand on a hillside overlooking the town of Antigua, Guatemala with an active volcano in the background.  It continues to remain one of the places on this planet that I feel most connected to spiritually.  Mexico, Guatemala and certain spots around Central America hold some amazing places

Birder Acknowledgements

Photo of a Red-necked Phalarope taken by Gordon Karre

I wouldn't be the birder I am today if it weren't for several people I've "met" along the way. Of course, I continue to grow and learn everyday. I'm a fast study with an appetite to know more.  Blogger and Facebook have been wonderful resources for hooking up with others to find those rare birds.  NONE OF THE PICTURES TODAY ARE MY OWN(except one really bad one!)  These were shots taken from treks we've been on together or like the shot below, from the mega rare bird we all saw on the same trail.    Hopefully this post will be a resource for new and old birders alike.  I've seen these birds, but as we all know, the camera doesn't always capture what we truly see.

Photo of the Buff-Collared Nightjar by Chris West  

First, I'd like to thank Chris West from The Southwest Wisconsin Birder for his fantastic Facebook page known as The Facebook Bird ID of the world.  There are times that we become stumped by a bird.  We don't like to do it often because our pride may get in the way, but sometimes a second opinion is necessary.  Over the past year, this site has helped me pay better attention to the details on those blasted gulls, flycatchers and sparrows!  Now the story behind the pic above.  The Buff-Collared Nightjar is a mega rare bird in the US.  It has stayed around the Madera Canyon area for quite awhile now.  Each night, birders from across the country come to listen and see this Mexican bird.  Chris West and Laurens Halsey captured it perfectly on our AZFO photo documentation page.  To capture this bird at night is super tricky so I just enjoyed watching it fly over my head and hear its call.  A lot of people were walking around the scrub with their torches(flashlights). This area has rattlesnakes and large centipedes.  One of our local experienced birders got stung.  Not cool. It's also an area full of illegal border crossing.  In fact, on the night we went, there was a border skirmish.  We were all too occupied with this fantastic bird to notice, but a birder left early and caught all the action on the road. In these types of birding situations out here, go with a buddy. Kathie even mentioned she wouldn't have night birded alone without me. I feel the same way. If you are interested in finding this bird, it's off of the Proctor trail at Madera Canyon in the primitive campsites(near campsite 7).  I believe there is more than one bird now which is great news.  But anyhow, this is a great shot(above) of the night bird. Now why didn't I get a shot?  Well I did, but this is how it turned out....

The flash caught the eye and made it glow. It flew right over my head along with a lot of bats:)  It's impressionistic art:)  Feelings about night photography.  In all honesty, nocturnal birding is one of my favorite things to do.  It's a breeze for my ears.  It's more about listening than anything else.  My eyes are terrible at night, but I can zone in on the bird with my ears and find the bird quickly.  I'm extremely helpful for those who can't hear very well. Usually I will be the first to pick up several light sounds and clue the group in.  On this night, I heard two.  Many thought it was just one, but there were two distinct calls....one from a distance and the one photographed by Chris above. Most said that there was one bird, but several days afterwards, there were reports of more Nightjars calling confirming my suspicions. I hope to capture this bird one day on film along with the Mexican Whip-poor-will, Common Poorwill, etc.  I had thought it impossible to capture these birds with my camera until I found the Lesser Nighthawk by accident.  It just proves that it's not impossible. But it is tricky.

Photo of a Bank Swallow by Gordon Karre

Another group of shots comes from my birder friend Gordon Karre from Birding Adventures.  We are both searching for lifebirds.  I am hoping that maybe we can plan trips together to different countries down the road. We will go to Mexico this upcoming weekend which isn't something many birders around here wanted to do.  Mexico, around the border, can be tricky. But I have the Spanish and background info that eliminates some of the risk.  I have found Gordon to be a powerful ally in the research behind the lifebirds.  He says he's not extreme, but I may think otherwise:)  He's a chaser with a plan. And I really enjoyed birding with him.  I am by no means an expert at all, but if you give me a list, I will learn the trails and memorize the calls quickly.  During one of those days on the trails, I was more focused on getting him birds for his lifelist and Arizona list.  So I became a little lazy with my camera:)  I'm not always in the mood to be a photographer.  Sometimes I just want to watch birds. As was the case with this bird below......

Photo of a Clay-colored Sparrow by Kathie Brown

None of this would be possible without my friend and mentor Kathie Brown from Kathie's Birds.  I will be forever grateful to her for taking me under her wing.  We work well together.  Because of Kathie, I have become more aware of things.  She taught me about ebird. She showed me the places.  Together we search new areas that we might not have visited alone.  The above pic is of the Clay-Colored Sparrow. We noticed at least 2 sparrows doing something different near the Whitewater Draw.  I was driving and not able to get real great shots of the bird.  Remember to shut off your car to minimize vibrations while trying to take pics. As a team, we both snapped shots of the birds from different angles.  This bird could have easily been seen as a juvenile Brewer's Sparrow, but my shot from a different angle helped ID the bird as a Clay-colored sparrow.  Unfortunately, my shot wasn't clear and crisp like this one.  People ask me, "Is it better to bird with others?"  The answer is yes....sometimes.  I have found a birding group with about 4-5 people to be alright.  It just depends on the talkers:)  I like talking, but it distracts my hearing which is the only way I can find the birds.  But many times, birding with 2 or 3 people is the best.  Without my photo, this sparrow would have been listed as a juvenile Brewer's.

Photo by Gordon Karre

Gordon really took great shots when he came to visit me a couple months ago.  They said Red-necked Phalaropes were seen.  I know what they look like as I had seen them before, but I was too lazy taking shots of them.  This is where Gordon and I differ in styles.  He is a perfectionist when it comes to photography and from what I've observed, he is "on" at all times when birding.  I sometimes get distracted:)

Photo of the Snowy Plovers by Gordon Karre

I have really enjoyed birding with so many wonderful people.  If there is one universal truth about life; it's that we work better as a group when we're all working together as a team towards a common goal.  I see what we are capable of, but it became more clear as I began to bird with others. We really can achieve anything.  And there isn't any shame in asking for help.  Whatever it is we do, it's better with a friend.  

White-rumped Sandpipers Photo by Gordon Karre

And speaking of friend.  I wouldn't be able to do any of this without the support from my partner in crime.  Micheal will sometimes go with me and bird, but he tolerates my obsessions.  He's the one who purchased those blasted cameras for my birthday!!! As a result, he created a monster.

Black-tailed Gnatcatcher taken by Micheal Ada

He does have the birder ability.  While it's mostly about the photography stuff, Micheal now enjoys calling out birds like this Black-tailed Gnatcatcher.  Like most people, he is fascinated with the colorful and odd acting birds. Finally, I'd like to thank people like Laurence Butler, John Williams, Deborah Vath, Mark Stevenson, Andrew Core and Rich Hoyer for their expertise and experience in the field.  Their chases have made me an addict to chasing as well.  If you ever question why you blog, don't.  I have met Cynthia White and Kelly Rishor out on the trails. These two are amazing.  I first met Cynthia out on the trails in Prescott searching for the Tundra Swans.  I met Kelly on the trails of Catalina State Park.  In fact, Kelly helped me get a mini-weekend in Mexico organized by hooking me up with another wildlife lover.  So thank you!!!  Both of these ladies became virtual friends as I suspect will several other bloggers during my upcoming trips around the country and elsewhere.  I have always believed that blogging is an educational tool for all of us.  A social way to network and a great place to meet new people who share similar interests.  I am not an ornithologist, but I am getting "home schooled" in the ways of birding.  Coming up on Las Aventuras.....a weekend with Gordon Karre in Mexico and my Guatemala travels.  More to come.....