Remembering Melissa

Loss.  It's one of the hardest things we all have to confront at some point in our lives.  This weekend, we had planned to make our annual trek to Rocky Point, Mexico where we'd eat our carrot cake, debate crazy things, eat way too much food....and of course, walk the beach and swim.  Bird:)

During a photo shoot on the beach with my first "real" camera. We had a lot of fun with this shot. Whenever Melissa was around, you were sure to laugh. 

A phone call on Thursday night changed everything as I was getting my camera equipment and clothes ready for the suitcase.  I wasn't expecting the "Melissa is gone, Chris." from the other end.  I sat in my chair numb. Then intensely sad. My emotions took over and the tears flowed. When there was nothing left, I just sat in my chair numb. Why??!!!!!  WHY??!!!  

But I realized that it wasn't the "why" that was important.  She's gone now.  There's no changing any of it. Melissa's silence is uncomfortable. She was never good with it when she was alive. Oh that girl could talk:) And right now, I wish I could hear her one last time talk about.....something.  

I tried to do some birding this weekend, but I found myself walking like a zombie on the trails.  Thankfully, I had a friend who helped me think about something else for awhile. I went to buy bird seed at my favorite store which usually cheers me up, but this time, it didn't.  

I met Melissa back in 2008 when we first moved into our place.  She was friends with my neighbor Bonnie.  Over the years, we had game nights in our homes, beers by the pool, treks to Rocky Point during Easter and hung out at special events around town. Melissa was an amazing art teacher who touched the lives of so many children.  And they loved her back.  She even had an art studio inside her home for Saturday morning sessions! 

We join Bonnie to help support an Altrusa event.

Like most artists, she was a unique individual.  I loved that about her. When Melissa was switched "on", she was "on".  And when it was time to sleep, she crashed hard....but always with her comfy jammies:)

My first photography lesson with Melissa...discovering the magic of sunsets on the beach

There were many nights of wine with delicious meals. During these moments, we'd discuss things like spirituality.  She was a very spiritual person. Melissa embraced all faiths and ideologies....and made it her own.  Her friends come from every type of background imaginable. And she would always make time for them!  We both were complete opposites on many topics.  But that never stopped us from being friends. It's why so many people love her. Her heart was gold.  Somehow, she found the good in everyone and exposed it to others allowing them to cross social paths. 

Melissa loved collecting sea shells for her art work.  Sand dollars were a favorite as were the colorful shells.

This year, she was finally acknowledged for being an excellent art instructor.  But we always knew she had a gift with children and art. When I think of Tucson and what makes it stand out from the rest of the cities in Arizona, I think of people like Melissa who bring their vibrant colors and vision to the Old Pueblo.  There is now an empty void here.  No loud voice.  No random, "My roof blew off what do I do now?" No more game nights. No more debates.  No more of me rolling my eyes at her pure insanity. No more of the things I loved about her. And that is hard to process for not only myself but for many others as well.  Melissa, I wish I could have been there for you in your time of need.  I wish I could have been a better friend.  

I will never forget the way you taught me how to let the sun shine through the darkest moments. Or how the sunset really makes us look fabulous for selfies:) I will always remember you walking on the beach at sunset. When I hear the words, "Sorry for your loss.", it's not just my loss. It's a loss for the entire community. We will miss you my friend.